The Singles' Life: Overcoming the Challenges.

THE SINGLES LIFE: OVERCOMING THE CHALLENGES.
The life a “single” lives will to an extent influence him/her when he’s married. The Bible says “train up a child the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it”.
The way a single goes in life determine the way he will grow. As a single, the life you live will either make or break you. There is a saying that says “as you make your bed so you lie on it.” What kind of bed are you making for yourself? A bed of thorns or a bed or roses? Remember nobody will ever live your life for you. You are the architect of your destiny. God can not come down from heaven to make your life, your life as a single all the depends on you. How are you planning your future? Who is your best companion? What life to do you want to live? Ecclesiastes 12:1-2 says “so remember your creator while you are still young, before those dismal days and years come when you will say I don’t enjoy life. That is when the light of the sun, the moon, and the stars will grow dim for you, and the rain clouds will never pass away.” The only way to have a blissful single hood that will transcend into a blissful married life is when God become the pivot in your life. Single life with out God is zero. The challenges in single hood are inevitable and the principles that could be used in overcoming them will be discuss as we progress. Therefore in this article you will be avail with a lot of well tested and proven principles that will guide you in overcoming the basic challenges you WILL encounter as a single. These principles if properly applied will lead you into making a RIGHT and LIFE partner.

Who is a Single?
I remembered as a little child in primary school, I was taught singular and plural in English Language. When a word refer to one person or an object, I was meant to understand is singular, and anything more than one is plural. Single in this parlance means one. Therefore a single is that person that is unmarried. He could be a teenager or an adult. When somebody is an adult does not mean he is married. Rather it means he is above the youthful age. In USA you are considered to be an adult if you are from 18years and above which I think is applicable to other part of the countries. Falling within this age bracket does not qualify you as a married man; rather it means you are a fully developed and “mature” person. It is assume at this age you should be able to take a decision of your own. It is expected that you can start thinking of having your own family, provide for yourself and take responsibilities. At this age the law can take its full course on you. Though in some countries, adult hood has been abused and bastardized either by the economic situations (unemployment, cost of living and low standard of living) of that country or some cultural and ideological factors. In some countries a child of 25years is still within the ambit of his parents. He can not provide for himself nor take a decision of its own. We have adults that are above 40years and are unmarried. This is not the case of ladies but Guys. Most “guys” have relegated their responsibilities to the background, either they are afraid to take up the challenges as an adult or situations and circumstances have made them to be like that. Therefore a single is that teenager or adult that is unmarried but in the course of life will hope to get married except if he/she decides otherwise. Some might ask why teenagers should be included as a single. A teenager is that young girl or boy who is within the age of 10-18years that has prospects. Every teenager hopes to be an adult and every adult hopes to be a “man” Therefore a teenager if unmarried is a single. In the sentence above “if” is underlined. Why? In most culture if a girl starts observing the symptoms of maturity especially when she starts having her menstruation, such a girl is considered ripe for marriage. Some parents give out their daughters in marriage at the age of 15years. While some at that same age have unwanted pregnancy. In most situations, any of the cases above could put the girl at risk. Some of them during child birth loss their life.

The Singles Life Explained!
Single hood is a period a single maximizes his potentials. It’s a period he discovers some other hidden talents imbedded in him. The characteristics of the single life below will give us a clue of what the singles life ought to be.
• This is the period of doing great exploit in Gods kingdom. Daniel said those that know their God shall do great thing and make exploit.
• It’s a period of choosing your role model/mentor. Also choosing those friends that will positively influence you.1 Corinthians 15:33 says “Do not be fooled, bad companion ruin good character”.
• It’s a period of putting your ideas to work and develop your potentials. The best time to work on your talents is while you are single. This gives you an ample time to plan and achieve success. • It’s a period to build characters and values. I believe you’ve heard of “Juvenile Delinquency” This is the period that can adversely affect a child behaviors. Therefore your single hood should be a period you choose your life style. Remember a character formed over a period of time becomes a habit. Develop a character for yourself. • It’s a period you learn how to make right decisions. The decision you make either make or break you. Where you are today is as a result you make years back. Well this might sound strange, but that’s the truth. Your decision is your life. • The singles life is a period to learn how to take responsibilities and overcome challenges. Challenges are not real, they are just a mirage. Avoiding challenges is learning to live with it. The easiest way to solve problems is to confront it. What you can not resolve as a single will meet you when you are married. • It’s a period to study the opposite sex. How much knowledge you have about the opposite sex will guide you in your relationships. For those who are already in courtship, it’s a period you should not take for granted.

Basic Challenges of the Singles Life.
Life as a single is sweet but at times has its own challenges. From my study and research, I found out that the singles have 2 basic challenges in their life. These challenges are as follows:
• Career Problems.
• Choosing a Right and Life Partner.

Career Problems:
The thought of what to do and achieve success has become a very big challenge among the singles. Most singles found themselves asking questions on how to build a successful career. When to start? Where to start? What to start on? In bid not to find answer to those questions, some have mismatched their careers and found themselves in vicious cycle of poverty. Much will not be discuss on career, since an article will fully be dedicated to it. You can read up this article in my blog. I believe if properly applied will solve the problems of choosing a successful career among the singles.

Choosing a Right and Life Partner.
Choosing the words “right and life partner” is a deliberate act. For any person to have a life partner, that partner most be a right partner. A wrong partner cannot make a life partner. A life partner is somebody you will live with forever. The worst that can happen to a man or woman is to marry the wrong person. As a man, how do you feel marrying a nagging woman? Proverb 27:15-16 describes her like water going drip- drip- drip on a rainy day. How can you keep her mouth quiet? Have you ever tried to stop the wind or even tried to hold handful oil? This is exactly how a nagging woman behaves. Or as a woman how do you feel to marry a man who is a drunkard, smoker, a flirt? I think that would be the last thing you will advise your enemy to have. Therefore this is illustration tell us how important it is to choose a right partner as a life partner. Most singles are in a dilemma of choosing a life partner due to experiences they had in the past or their parents had in the past. Some of the singles are of a single parents whose mother or father has been divorced by either of the two parties. As a result of this bitter encounter some single have chosen not to marry while others are still looking for signs and miracles to know if they are in a safe hand. There is nothing wrong being a single, but if you can not control the urge of sexual satisfaction, it’s advisable and proper you marry.-1 corinth 7:8. Choosing a right and life partner is a critical decision a single makes in a life time. It’s a decision that can break a marriage or make a marriage. Therefore in taking such decision, it calls for a careful thought and analysis before saying “I do”. Choosing a life partner if not properly plan will lead to divorce in marriage. As a result of this, marriage experts advocate a reasonable period of courtship at least minimum of 2-3 years. This period will avail you the opportunities to see the flaws of your would-be husband or wife. This is the period you study and interview your partner. Courtship is not a period of flippancy or a period you allow your emotions to override your intention. This is the period you dig out information concerning your future spouse. This information could be on religious background, personality, family background, culture, education and career. These will guide you in making a proper decision. The extent you know your spouse will help you to overcome some marital challenges. Courtship is not a sin as others think. It becomes a sin or sinful when the purpose is defeated. Sex during courtship (premarital sex) destroys the foundation of courtship. Do not defile your body, for your body is the temple of the holy ghost-1 Corith 6:19-20. Avoid immorality, any other sin a man commits does not affect his body, but the man who is guilty of sexual immorality sins against his own body. Do not defile the bed of your marriage before its due date. You can read on courtship in my blog “courtship: A prerequisite for successful Marriage.” In this article you will get everything you want on courtship and marriage you will see hundred plus one reasons while you should court before marrying. And how you can have a successful courtship.

Overcoming the Singles Life Challenges.
Life challenges are inevitable in every human endeavor. The ability to overcomes it, it’s our responsibility. Any challenges that come to you is either less than you or you are greater than it. The fact still remains that most people have been overwhelmed by their challenges. Therefore in overcoming some of the challenges the singles encounter, these are some essential tips: • Every decision you make should be guided by Gods word. If you have not informed God about your decision, no body is good to hear it. His blessings added no sorrows or pains. • Always be in close contact with your pastor or man of God. A sincere minister of God will tell you the truth and the right thing to do. Remember they are their for you. • You and your partner should be groomed in the things of God. Create time to study the word of God, meditate on it and apply it in your daily living. Pray and fast together, this fine tone your spirit in receiving from God. Sow a seed of faith towards your intention and be expectant. • Develop and always keep a positive mind set. Remember you are a product of what you think. The Bible says “Guide your heart with all diligence from their comes the issues of life”-Proverb 4:23. As a single, speak positive-filled words about your future. Death and life lies in the power of the tongue. • If you are into courtship, avoid things that can break the courtship or lead you to sin, such as “kissing”, romancing, using of vulgar words, dressing “indecently”, keeping late night, excessive hugging, sitting or relaxing on his/her laps etc. The Bible says “If your left hand will lead you to sin, you cut it off. Its better you enter life with one hand than to enter hell with your two hands. The best gift you can give to your husband is your virginity on the wedding night. Though the world is perverse with all kinds of evil and wickedness, but whatever you desire to achieve is possible. What the mind conceive and believe it can achieve. With God all thins are possible. • Make sure you add value to your life everyday you live. Think of one thing you will do that will take you closer to your goal. A journey of a thousand mile start with a step. • See challenges as a spring board. Something that will catapult you to the next level. Every challenge that comes to you is to make you a better person. Be bold to confront it. Never you accept defeat. • Know the vision, goal of your spouse and match it will yours. Do not be tired to bring out the best from your relationship. Nothing good comes so easy. The road might be a little bit difficult at initial but persistency and consistency, you will surely make it. The Bible says “the step of the righteous are ordered by God” • Lay your hands on motivational/spiritual books and tapes. Let it be part of your life. Create time to study them. Great secrets are imbedded in them. • Believe in yourself. Believe you can do it. Do the impossible. The Bible says “I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me”-Philippians 4”13. • Finally be Mr. or Miss RIGHT. Stop searching for the right person. Likes attract likes. Work on yourself. Conclusion. Life is worth living only if you desire it. Have drive for self improvement. As I said previously any challenge that comes to you is less than you or you are more than it. See your single hood as period to work on self and bring out the best of it. You can do it. It is possible.